Wednesday, September 29, 2004

We Don't Need No Education...

Ok, my little monkeys. I knew going into the whole rock and roll list thing would create a stir; and oh! what a stir! A few quick thoughts on the comments thus far...

Anonymous: To who I don't know; for your information, Morrisey came in at #42. Also, have the testicular fortitude to at least name your entry! Coward! A pox on thee! I had the canastas to stick my neck way out in voicing my opinion that Steve Perry is the greatest male rock vocalist. Kindly show me the same courtesy!

Mitch: Yeah, it was tough to put the Boss so far down, but I never really considered him a "rock" vocalist, at least not in the traditional sense of the others. Perhaps on a different list, both he and John Cougar would fare better...

Beth: My darling, big brown-eyed Beth. I at first was taken aback at the sheer vitriol your comment exuded. Feeling shamed by this, I decided to investigate this female who came at me so forcefully. So, I took a little ride on the check out Beth's profile and know thy enemy train.

Here's what I found...

Gender: female
Location: Massachusetts : United States

About Me
I've already written enough about myself on my three blogs. If you can take the self-absorption, I encourage you to visit any one of them.

Describe the sound of a moist waffle falling onto a hot griddle.
"I did not have sex with that woman."

Red Sox
New England Patriots
Nine Inch Nails
Chuck Palahniuk
Jhonen Vasquez
Invader Zim

Favorite Movies
American Beauty

Favorite Music
Nine Inch Nails
Tori Amos
Johnny Cash
Goodspeed! You Black Emperor
Telefon Tel Aviv
The Pixies
Ani Difranco

Favorite Books
Johnny the Homicidal Maniac

Now, in reading this information, I couldn't help but notice one thing...

(excuse me while I clear my throat....ahem...)

Where is Chris Cornell or Soundgarden on your list?


And with that, we get ready for a little second period action with the score

Thirsty Bunny 1, The Rest of you Chicken F*ckers 0

Monday, September 20, 2004

Rock and Roll will never die.

Hello, faithful little monkeys. I have returned from places near and far with many tales of debauchery and wackiness. But first, i submit for your consideration,

The Best Rock Male Vocalists

It dawned on me today that too little attention is paid to those who brought rock home. Those that made us want to be bad-ass, drink a lot of beer, and love porn; and yet, they could capture our emotions and crush them like a gentle drop of dew on a summer's leaf. (Hey, did anyone else's bullshit meter just go off? Mine is going nuts. huh.)

Anyway, as previously stated, I present to you my list of

The Best Rock Male Vocalists

The first 20 I am strong on, the rest are somewhat in order, but I gots stuff to do! And now, without further ado, i give you...

The Best Rock Male Vocalists

1. Steve Perry (Journey)
2. David Lee Roth (Van Halen)
3. Bonn Scott (AC/DC)
4. Rob Halford (Judas Priest)
5. Freddy Mercury (Queen)
6. Steven Tyler (Aerosmith)
7. Roger Daltrey (The Who)
8. Robert Plant (Led Zepplin)
9. Roger Waters (Pink Floyd)
10. Bono (U2)
11. Chris Cornell (Soundgarden)
12. Ozzy Ozbourne
13. Bruce Dickinson (Iron Maiden)
14. Brad Delp (Boston)
15. Mick Jagger (The Rolling Stones)
16. Sting (The Police)
17. Geddy Lee (Rush)
18. Axl Rose (Guns N Roses)
19. Billy Idol
20. Joe Elliot (Def Leppard)
21. Prince
22. George Thorogood
23. John Fogerty (CCR)
24. Joey Ramone (The Ramones)
25.David Bowie
26. Bob Seger
27. Joe Cocker
28. Ian Astbury (The Cult)
29. David Coverdale (Whitesnake)
30. Corey Glover (Living Color)
31. Neil Young
32. Brett Michaels (Poison)
33. Geoff Tate (Queensryche)
34. Alice Cooper
35. Paul McCartney (The Beatles)
36. Frank Zappa
37. James Hetfield (Metallica)
38. Bruce Springsteen
39. Peter Gabriel (Genesis)
40. Johnny Rotten (Sex Pistols)
41. Joe Strummer (The Clash)
42. Morissey (The Smiths)
43. Billy Gibbons (ZZ Top)
44. Dave Mustaine (Megadeth)
45. Billy Corgan (Smashing Pumpkins)
46. Kurt Cobain (Nirvana)
47. Jim Morrison (The Doors)
48. Gregg Allman (Allman Brothers Band)
49. David Gilmour (Pink Floyd)
50. John Bon Jovi (Bon Jovi)
51. Trent Reznor (Nine Inch Nails)
52. Eric Burdon (Animals)
53. Warren Zevon
54. Eddie Vedder (Pearl Jam)
55. Don Dokken (Dokken)
56. Steve Miller
57. Ronnie Van Zant (Lynyrd Skynyrd)
58. Robin Zander (Cheap Trick)
59. Lou Gramm (Foreigner)
60. David Byrne (Talking Heads)
61. Eric Clapton
62. Henry Rollins (Black Flag)
63. Edgar Winter
64. Joe Walsh (Eagles).
65. Stevie Ray Vaughan
66. Jimi Hendrix
67. Tom Petty
68. Jeff Keith (Tesla)
69. Dave Mustaine (Megadeth)
70. John Kay (Steppenwolf)

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

Do it !!!


I became a Yankees fan the first time my daddy f*cked me.


Now go tell your mother you love her, drink an icy cold beer ot three, and go make sweet love to some sort of barnyard animal (unless you are a Yankees fan, then you probably already are and should quit the livestock and go back to takin' it downtown from pops); the world is coming to an end...

The Sox might just do it.

Let's say, hypothetically (and I stress hypothetically) you check your email one morning as you try to do every day, and there is an email from an old school buddy living in California. Now let's say (again, hypothetically) that buddy has forwarded you a link under the guise of "ya gotta see this!!!" So, you click on it. After a few seconds the screen goes dark, and...

you see an old ex-girlfriend in a porn that cost about fifteen bucks to make, including buying coffee for the cast and crew when it's a wrap.


(Well, Yeesh hypothetically)